I DONT BELONG HERE!!!

yea well .. yea I know its my first day over here ! but I still cant take it ! i just dont belong here ! Im hating it so much ! ( btw Im taking about my first day in my new higher education institute ) .. it just ,,, ah i dont know ~!! o hot?? so sunny? and I just vcant stand this place at all ! nor the people ! maybe i just didnt bled well and I should give it a few more days .. but so far Im so not doing well ! I keep on gettng lost and lost over and over again and walk for long time to find my self SOMEWHERE ELSE ! I dont know .. but is it too late to pull off? I just dont wanna continue studyin here ! its cool yea ...the name of it is soo cool ! but its so much more than what I can stand ! at the moment I just thank god I wasnt accepted n a scholarship out side coz its all already hard while Im with my family and i call them every 10 secs ask them where to go and what to do !!!!! ... one good thing is that I found a music room ! yea ... when I asked my sister about it she told me that its closed and no one can get access to it ... (turned into a store perphaps) she said .. I was walking and saw the sign and had this devilesh though of giving it a chance and see whats gonna happen so I followed the signs but i ended up in offices which are meant for males student to go :S !!! how ever it was the right place but seeing a girl over there was just un expected ... I talked to the one in charge and told him that I studied music and everything and he gave me the room keys and he was so glad to do that and excited ! even before I start talking or anything .. I truley wonder why :S !
anyhow i was ABOUT to break down from everything around me but thank god he opened the music room and told me that its okay to play and I can take my time there ... it was a nice warm shullter at that moment .. yea .. thats where i belong .. one big room with red carpet ... 2 up righted grand pianos and another 2 grand pianos .. guitars everywhere all over the place on the ground and on the pianos themselves .. it seems that omanis definition of music is just guitar ..... it was dusty a lil ,, all the pianos were out of tune but I felt comfortable in that place .. I stayed there for a while , played a lil then decided that its time to leave this warm place and continue .. yea ,, after all we cant stay in our comfert zone forever ... and that room happenes to b my comfort zone in this place... i'll be going there more often when ever I have a bad time over here .. I seriously dont plan to make any friends and socialize I just wanna stay alone for this five comming years and enjoy m self alone .. take care of my self and depend on my own ... yea .. I wanna getgood grades and end up graduating .. Major of achitecture engineering and a minor of interior designing ...


I really hope that I gave a good idea about my self to the music manager coz I was already in a bad mood but I tried my best .. hopefully they'll have some activities and Im planning to join the music ad art group over here .. maybe teach some basics and learn some new stuff from whos better than me ...


aHhhh I love this blog now I feel a lil bit better :) !